The Value of Labour Support

Shared by: Tara Hayden


I believe there is great value to be had for a woman and her partner when they engage the services of a doula.  I believe it is crucial for a woman to feel cared for and supported during one of the most important events of her life.  Feeling supported and cared for can translate into deeper relaxation which in turn can result in a more positive birth outcome.  I found it fascinating to read that no matter what the outcome (whether or not a birth plan is able to be followed or not), if a woman feels secure, cared for and supported during her birth experience the more positive she feels about that experience.  For a doula, I think that sounds very encouraging!

It seems to me that the doula can be useful as well, to the partner during labour.  Despite how many books have been read, videos watched and discussions had, birth is one of those things that is difficult to understand unless you have gone through it yourself.  I hope to provide that support and experience to the partner so that he/she feels comfortable and involved in the birth experience as well. 

I plan to be the kind of doula who emotionally and physically supports a woman and her partner through the birth experience with great sensitivity and gentleness.  It is my goal to give each new mom-to-be the kind of birth experience that they desire, despite my own personal beliefs.  I also aim to educate women about their bodies, what their body is capable of and why, and what positions, movements and techniques can be used during labour to achieve the most efficient birth possible.

I Am a Doula

Shared by: Crystal Tite

I am a doula.

I speak with my voice, but also with my heart and my hands.

I massage backs and squeeze hips; stroke legs and wipe foreheads.

I whisper words of encouragement in moments of exhaustion and revel in the glow of a labouring woman’s energy.

I educate, inform, reassure and comfort with my knowledge and experience. I turn ‘informed consent’ into informed choice.

I help women have faith in their bodies, their babies and the fact that thousands of years of evolution cannot be wrong.

I assist couples and individuals in creating birth environments that they feel safe, secure and comfortable in.

I protect the space surrounding the childbearing family by acting as a filter and cushion between the outside world and the labouring.

I meet with families not only when they are in labour, but before and after as well.

I help to dispel myths and ease fears.

I include fathers and partners so that they can be as involved in the birth experience as they wish to be.

I give strength, energy and hope when a woman feels hopeless and weary.

I hold hands, cradle faces, lock eyes and facilitate breathing for hours on end.

I am a professional, a friend, and a confidant.

I provide families with clear, concise, unbiased information and access to resources so they can make choices that are best for their situations.

I give women the confidence and guts to advocate for themselves when faced with adversity.

I am calm and firm, soft and strong, patient and eager.

I believe in a woman’s body and ability to achieve anything she sets her heart on.

I walk halls, climb stairs, and do lunges and squats.

I help mothers learn how to latch and hold their new nurslings.

I am a shoulder to cry on, a sounding board to express frustration at, a body to grab when a contraction takes over.

I empathize.

I am on call for clients day and night and always show up with a smile on my face and love in my heart.

I document the birth on paper and in pictures. I can capture the essence of the moment in a single photograph.

I provide continuous emotional and physical support regardless of the outcome. I am in this for the journey as well as the final destination of birth.

I am a woman, a mother, a sister, a mentor.

I believe that birth is normal, natural and safe.

I help families fulfill their birth wishes and achieve the things that they feel are important.

I am blessed and honoured to be able to be a part of such a momentous, spiritual event in the lives of women and their families.

I am a doula.

Birth Memory

Shared by: Erin Cullen

When I became pregnant two and a half years ago, my entire outlook on life shifted.  I loved being pregnant; loved the way that I felt, and loved the excitement I had for the future.  Both my two brothers and I had been born at home, and I think my mom really instilled the beauty of birth in me – I remember being shown my brother’s placenta after he was born, and the whole process seemed really natural and calm.  And this is partly why I think my pregnancy was such a positive experience, and my daughter’s birth, as well.

That being said, I realize that every pregnancy and birth is very different – every circumstance, and every perceived notion of how things are going to be comes from a very different place, and that is what makes it beautiful, and sometimes, frightening.  The more stories I have heard from women, the more I’ve realized how much the birth process really affects those involved.  It is a memory that does not fade, and for some can be very traumatizing or hurtful.  It is because of all this that the idea of being a doula became so appealing.  To be able to help make the experience more positive, and to help the family feel more empowered – what could be better than that?

The more I learn about doulas, the more important their role became.  Taking the course [editor’s note: DONA International’s birth doula training] also introduced me to such a wonderful and diverse range of women – it feels like a really warm and open community and that is hard to find sometimes.  I really believe that being a doula would be a fulfilling, exciting and interesting job – the very thing I have been searching for in a career.  It would be rewarding to know that I was helping a family have a great first experience – a great head start.

The Ripple Effect

Shared by: Melanie Little

My personal birth philosophy is that every woman deserves to experience birth in a way that feels natural and comfortable for them – in a way in which she feels fulfilled and satisfied according to her own definition of success. I believe this to be true regardless of whether a woman is more comfortable with the medical model or the midwifery model of care, prefers medication or a non intervention approach, wishes to birth at home or in the hospital, all women (and their partners).

In addition to the NUMEROUS physical benefits proven with doula support, I have noticed a clear societal effect. The self esteem and self confidence boost (or, conversely, the loss of self esteem and self worth) a woman feels during and after her labors can and do have a profound impact on that woman as an individual, as a partner and as a mother.

When a mother has a 'traumatic' birth experience this can become what she perceives birth to be like in its entirety. If she believes birth to be frightening, painful, unsupported, lonely or cold this may be what she conveys to other expecting women she meets. I believe this is truly a tragic outcome as it deepens the fear of birth already so prevalent in North American culture. When she is informed, empowered, safe, felt she was part of the process – when she feels that she had a successful birth as she defines it this is the story she tells other expectant mothers. She passes that empowerment on in her words and reassurances. “You can do it don't worry” “Just let your body do its job” “Don't let anyone make you feel bad about your choices” - these are some of the phrases I have heard from one mother to another that have genuinely inspired women while so many others around them are telling their 'horror stories'.

When birth doesn't not go as hoped (whether it is unplanned medications, moving from home to hospital, the woman's partner does not make it in time and so forth), the presence of a doula can be invaluable in reconciling and sorting through a mother's thoughts and emotions. An unrelated support person may be able to provide a different perspective to the situation – especially if what mom or her partner THOUGHT happened is not what actually occurred.

I believe that the benefits of doula support goes well beyond the laboring couple and the immediate birth, and moves through our society like a warm wind. A Doula For Every Woman Who Wants One? Absolutely.

Supporting Moms From First Baby to Last

Shared by: Tova Matchett

I have always known that I wanted to do something that involved pregnant women and babies.  While pregnant with my first daughter I learned about the role of a Doula and what a Doula does.  Although I was very intrigued by the idea, I had my hands full with a new baby and wasn’t able to take this interest any further.  I had my son only 1 ½ years later and realized after going through two births myself how very different every birth truly is, even when it is the same person giving birth. 

I think because of this understanding, it makes me realize the incredible importance that women really need to have someone there for support and encouragement, regardless of the fact that this is their first birth or their fourth. 

I think it is not only important to support the Mother through this journey but also the family that is involved.  The impact of a new baby on the home is all encompassing and affects every detail of home life: for the mother herself, the relationship between the mother and father and for any existing children at the time of the new baby’s birth.

Although you like to think that everything is happiness and sunshine, it is important to realize that there are growing pains involved when a woman is pregnant and when that new baby enters the home – how nice to have somebody encouraging, supportive and positive to rely on when that beautiful baby enters the world!!  I relish the idea of being able to be that resource for somebody.

Doulas and a Negative Outcome

Shared By: Sonja Kohlman

What is the role of a doula?  It is a question I get asked many times from prospective clients and curious acquaintances alike.  A question I continuously ask of myself.  What do I do?  My pat answer is that I provide emotional support and suggestions for comfort measures to women and their partners during the birth process. 

But what I really do is act as a companion to couples and sometimes individuals during one of the most sacred moments in the human family, a moment that is as common place and mundane as it is life-altering.  As a companion, I act as a witness without judgment to the incredible events and the accompanying emotions.  My “job” is to stay present to the feelings felt by labouring women and their partners.  Feelings such as excitement, joy, and fear, a gamut of emotions that is different for each situation. 

The expectation of new life surrounds the birth experience.  But sometimes things go wrong, what we euphemistically call a negative outcome.   The expectation of birth is suddenly met instead with the shock of death either of the baby or even more rarely, the mother.

What do I do?  What is the role of the doula?  What I have come to grips with is that my role doesn’t change.  I am a companion still.  And it is my role to stay present to the feelings and emotions of those suffering a loss.  Another’s grief is unfathomable.  It is not a doula’s role to understand.  Another’s pain is immeasurable.  It is not a doula’s role to console.  A doula listens deeply, a doula acknowledges the suffering, a doula stands as a witness to another’s pain.  It is in this way that a doula contributes to the healing process.

Labouring to be a doula

shared by: Sonja Kohlman

Doula work is a call to serve.  We choose to become doulas out of a desire to serve our communities and individuals.  But to choose to serve means more than simply offering support or help.  To choose to serve is also a responsibility to not burden those we serve with our own needs.

As human beings, we all have personal needs such as to feel important, to feel connected to others, to feel valued and so on.  But to succeed as doulas and to fulfill the true meaning of service, we must not allow our needs to interfere with helping women achieve their birth and post partum goals.  How we accomplish this is to undertake our own emotional work.

Emotional work is about self reflection and self honesty.  Through emotional work, we learn about ourselves and that is how we grow.  We recognize what our needs are and how we can fulfill them in a balanced and wholesome way.  And most importantly as doulas, through emotional work we keep our needs from interfering with those of our clients.  How you undertake your emotional work is highly personal and can mean talking with trusted colleagues, journaling, contemplation or even creative outlets like art.

The technical work, the coursework, the CEUs are vital to our education and provide the knowledge base to act as a labour companion.  The Doula Book by Klaus et al compels us to ask ourselves if we are suitable to doula work and we take into consideration lifestyle aspects like erratic and sometimes lengthy hours, middle of the night phone calls, and lack of a steady income.  But we cannot overlook that being involved in such significant life events such as the birth process and post partum family life entails a powerful duty to put our needs aside temporarily.   

It is imperative to consider the personal growth each one of us must undertake in order to grow as a doula.  Being honest with ourselves and recognizing our needs can sometimes make us feel uncomfortable and that it why it is such hard work.  Most of us are moved to become doulas by the desire to help labouring women and mothers with new babies.  We are called to serve.  In order to serve other women, we must put our needs aside and we can only put our needs aside if we are willing to engage in the difficult task of self examination.  As doulas, emotional work and personal growth are our hard work.  As doulas, this is how we labour.