shared by: Sonja Kohlman
Doula work is a call to serve. We choose to become doulas out of a desire to serve our communities and individuals. But to choose to serve means more than simply offering support or help. To choose to serve is also a responsibility to not burden those we serve with our own needs.
As human beings, we all have personal needs such as to feel important, to feel connected to others, to feel valued and so on. But to succeed as doulas and to fulfill the true meaning of service, we must not allow our needs to interfere with helping women achieve their birth and post partum goals. How we accomplish this is to undertake our own emotional work.
Emotional work is about self reflection and self honesty. Through emotional work, we learn about ourselves and that is how we grow. We recognize what our needs are and how we can fulfill them in a balanced and wholesome way. And most importantly as doulas, through emotional work we keep our needs from interfering with those of our clients. How you undertake your emotional work is highly personal and can mean talking with trusted colleagues, journaling, contemplation or even creative outlets like art.
The technical work, the coursework, the CEUs are vital to our education and provide the knowledge base to act as a labour companion. The Doula Book by Klaus et al compels us to ask ourselves if we are suitable to doula work and we take into consideration lifestyle aspects like erratic and sometimes lengthy hours, middle of the night phone calls, and lack of a steady income. But we cannot overlook that being involved in such significant life events such as the birth process and post partum family life entails a powerful duty to put our needs aside temporarily.
It is imperative to consider the personal growth each one of us must undertake in order to grow as a doula. Being honest with ourselves and recognizing our needs can sometimes make us feel uncomfortable and that it why it is such hard work. Most of us are moved to become doulas by the desire to help labouring women and mothers with new babies. We are called to serve. In order to serve other women, we must put our needs aside and we can only put our needs aside if we are willing to engage in the difficult task of self examination. As doulas, emotional work and personal growth are our hard work. As doulas, this is how we labour.
